Thursday, March 16, 2006

Before-work Ramblings

March is already half over, and I'm absolutely stunned.

Things are going pretty well on this side of the computer screen, as I continue on my quest to figure out life, and what it's all about. Can I gloat a little? I'm really fucking proud of myself lately, and the person I am becoming. All this time it felt like I was treading water, but now I'm seeing how necessary treading water can be sometimes. In the past few years I've learned more about myself than probably I had in the prior years of my life. I know it seems like I was stagnant for an eternity (especially since you guys only just met me when the rut hit), but in all reality, the lessons came on very quick, and it's sinking in.

With that said, sometimes you really have to be on the bottom to truly appriciate the top, and well, that's where I'm heading.

On the down side, there are "nightmares" of my previous life that simply won't go away. They won't leave me alone, despite the fact that they promised they would. I have to filter out his comments, and put them behind me as much as they try to be a part of my life. I refuse to let them get to me. And, as kind as the gestures are, it's way past the point of creepy now, and I'm going to talk to the friends and family about it.

It's weird, because the person doing this cares on the outside...but after all that happened, it's creepy. I just don't want him around, at all. He even sent a package to my home. So please, if you care about me and want to make things better in my life, turn around and walk away. My family and friends are starting to worry, and I really don't want trouble when things are going so well for me. :(


I work 4:30 - midnight tonight, and it's going to be a good night. It'll be good, because I felt as though I haven't worked in ages. While typically I hate returning to work, it's beginning to look more and more temporary as time passes, so I kind of want to enjoy some of the time I have there with my co-workers.

Quitting? Possibly. It depends on what my contact dermatitus is being agitated by. It's definitely something at work, and if it would be something unavoidable like the formaldahyde in money...well...I'm not allowed making food either so I'm fucked as both cook and cashier.

Leave it to me to be allergic to money. I guess it's a good thing I don't have much to begin with, huh?

I'll talk to you guys later tonight, and maybe I'll give you some insider info on this cute guy I talked to on the phone last night.

I'm all smiles!

Hugs, peace, love, and smooches to all.