Saturday, February 10, 2007

Before-Bed Ramblings

As expected, here I am at 2:19 AM, blogging.

Just came back from Subway...actually a Subway within a Snappy's convenience store. What does this mean? It means twenty-four hour subs - but most importantly: chicken bacon ranch wraps at my convenience.

Wendy and I rode around down for the majority of the night jamming to music. Tonight it was Mariah Carey, Earth Wind and Fire, Michael W. Smith, and the Beach Boys. It wasn't long after we started though that we ended up at the Snappy's convenience store to hang out with one of the employees we're friends with.

Work passed without much event tonight. I of course, was allowed to wear jeans if I paid a dollar - and so I did. My new spiffy boot cut jeans...from Walmart. (Hey...a boys gotta save ya know!) Somehow it made work a lot more bearable, and fun. Things were a little crazy tonight (as they usually are on Fridays), but it was like the new jeans had given me energy. It also helped that I worked with Karen - a lesbian friend of mine. We always have a blast.

So...although I've been pretty quiet on here, there has been plenty going on to write about. Firstly, my brother has undergone psychiatric evaluation to learn about the effects of his peers constantly tormenting him in school. Having spent a week in a mental health ward, undergone various treatments, and being medicated - my brother is now back home in a "half way" program where a teacher comes to the house. Mom's thinking about home schooling him permanently; the harrassment is THAT bad.

I won't go into details...but he was seriously suicidal. We know it for a fact.

Part of what he gets picked on is about his gay brother. (Yeah...that's me btw.) So naturally, that's been weighing heavily on my mind as to what I could do or say to make up for something like that. Up until a week or two ago, I thought he wasn't aware of my sexuality. It was something we just kind of hid from him I guess. But give the boy credit...he found my myspace with little effort and dicovered the fact on his own. (He doesn't care either.)

I know it's natural to want to make up for the pain I caused him by 'being what I am' - but should I really have to apologize for something I can't help? Perhaps it's the duty of his enemie's parents to apologize for breeding such hateful little children.

Who knows?

Love n Peace